Daddy when you gonna turn around and recognize me? When will I have your respect that I need? When you gonna talk to me and allow me to learn? When you going to show me the love that I yearn? Daddy, when you going to hold me the way I need to be held, and when you going to tell me the things that I need you to tell? When are going to shelter me from my internal storm, and let me feel inside my spirit that you can keep me warm. Daddy, when will the voice from you caress me with joy, instead of dampening my spirit and making me feel like a broken toy? Daddy when you gonna show me that you want to live to see my life, instead of smoking and drinking and not living right? When you gonna turn to me as a source of indulgence and height, instead of fussing and arguing because my actions are not in your light? Daddy I could love you till loving you disappears out of sight? But it is hard to love you when I feel I am not being treated right. Ain’t no way I am perfect, I posses a fault on every part of my being, but I feel no help to enhance me, so my spirit tares at it’s seam. You have changed, but you need to change some more, before I am gone out of your life not wanting to walk back through that door. I respect who you are, and what you have done, and the obstacles in our way that you have helped us to overcome. But I am older now, and I see better things that I use to hear. My brain is sharper and I view the picture more clearly. I understand more the situation up under my feet, and that is why I don’t want to sew something that we may not want to reap. Can you hear me daddy or do I have to speak, my will is strong, yet my patience is getting weak. I don’t want to turn away, but I am not sure that I see another way. You would probably be surprised, how many times I pray to God each day. I ask him to change things and to give me another life, and if not, give me the strength to carry on through this fight. I feel it’s ashamed that I cannot grow up fast enough, so I can graduate and leave with all of my stuff. My stomach aches between the joy, the hate, and the confusion. The stress I digest is so internally abusing. I am young at this point I should be cruising, life to me should be fun and somewhat amusing. Instead I run in circles with no place to go, my skin is warm to the touch and my heart is as cold as snow. Excuse me daddy I don’t mean to make you mad, I just need to tell you that I am feeling bad. We are at a point where there should be so much fun to be had, not with my friends, but with my very on dad. But you keep disappearing behind that unemotional wall, where you can only hear me when you call. I am trying to climb over it but too afraid that I may fall, so I sit here in limbo feeling two feet tall. Traces of my tears have made tracks into my heart and lord only knows at what moment it will break apart. Daddy I love you and I know you love me, you work tremendously hard to allow me to do the things that I do. But our world’s are on separate ends of the river, and the bridge is falling apart. I don’t know where it will end, and I am not sure where we should start. I just had to speak to you Daddy, from a daughter’s heart!